Adoption is a beautiful selfless act of love. For many, it is a way to form or extend a family while at the same time offering warmth, affection, and protection to children who otherwise might never experience these things – things that only a truly loving family and a stable household can guarantee. There is no doubt, that adoption can be a meaningful and enriching experience. However, the decision to adopt should not be taken lightly. In this article, we will analyze 4 vital questions to consider before taking this important step. We hope that the information found here will help you decide if you are truly ready to adopt a child.
Why Do You Want to Adopt?
Even though the answer to this question seems simple at first (“I want a child”), the true and honest answer requires a prospective adoptive parent (or parents) to face some of the most complex issues about themselves. The issues experienced by a person or a couple who decide to adopt after unsuccessful attempts to conceive will be markedly different from those faced by someone for whom adoption is their first choice. Prospective adoptive parents need to realize that their motives will have a profound effect on their attitudes towards the child they are going to adopt. After all, raising any child can only be successful if the parents are willing to be selfless. Therefore, a prospective parent must realize that it is the child and their well-being that are the most important parts of the adoption equation.
Are You Prepared for the Commitment?
There are actually many different kinds of commitments you need to be prepared for when you embark on this journey. First, there is the financial commitment of being able to provide for the needs of a child for years and decades to come. According to some estimates, raising a child to the age of 17 can cost between $140,000 and $290,000. This is a considerable investment and prospective parents must analyze their budget to see if they can afford to provide for a child long-term.
Another kind of commitment relates to being able to endure the emotional and psychological burden of the adoption process. There is no guarantee that the process will be seamless. Sometimes it can take years before you encounter a perfect match for your family. And if, for some reason, you decide to step away from the process in the middle of it, it can be devastating both to you and to your prospective adoptive child.
Finally, parenthood is a commitment in and of itself. As one writer puts it, “there are no sick days or vacations from being a parent.” If you are not sure if you are prepared for all of the challenges of parenthood, taking parenting classes might help you make the decision.
What Kind of Adoption Should You Choose?
You have several different options. You can choose between going through the adoption process with social services, a private agency, or work with an attorney or an intermediary. Choosing the type of adoption also means choosing the type of legal framework involved. There are open, semi-open, and closed adoptions. In a closed adoption, the adoptive parents and the biological parents never meet. In a semi-open or open adoption, it is possible to arrange for such meeting and even stay in touch in the years following the adoption.
What Age Do You Want the Child to Be?
If it’s important for you to experience the infancy of your child, then you should consider domestic or international newborn adoption. One advantage of a newborn adoption is that it can take much less time than adopting an older child. However, it also often means you will have to meet the birth parents of the child – since they usually choose the adoptive parents.
On the other hand, adopting an older child may work better for some families. For example, if you (and your partner) are older, you might find the prospect of taking care of an infant too challenging. If that’s the case, however, you must be prepared to deal with the emotional fallout of the child’s past and their memories of their birth parents, orphanage, or foster families.
Rotella & Hernandez – Trusted Legal Representation in Adoption Matters
Rotella & Hernandez recognize, cherish, and champion each family’s right to have children – and the rights of a child to have parents. We also realize that the adoption process can be overwhelming, costly, and time-consuming. That’s why if you are preparing for an adoption, we would like to help you. Contact us today to talk about the details of your adoption and let’s see how we can assist.